What Is a Wedding Reception? Here's Everything You Need to Know About Planning a Party No One Will Ever Forget

While the ceremony that turns you and your partner from engaged to married is the most essential part of your wedding day, the celebration that surrounds it—your wedding reception—is just as exciting. Whether you choose a big bash or an intimate affair, a casual picnic or a black-tie dinner, the details of your reception should be uniquely yours. 

Since there are so many riffs on the post-nuptial party these days, you may be wondering about what a reception truly is at its core. Think of it this way: It's the exclamation point of your ceremony and should be planned and designed as such. “People stop their lives to make attending your wedding a priority,” says event planner Jove Meyer. “There just are not that many events in life where everyone you love is in one room, celebrating you and love, joy, and happiness!” 

Create a personal and memorable reception with our expert guide to the history, evolution, and importance of this ancient tradition.

How a Wedding Reception Differs from a Ceremony

Though wedding ceremonies and wedding receptions often occur on the same date, with the same guest list, and even sometimes in the same building, they have two different purposes: The ceremony unites the couple in marriage, and the reception honors that milestone. 

“The easiest way to describe a wedding reception is that it is a celebration, typically held immediately following a wedding ceremony, where wedding guests gather to eat, drink, and socialize with the newlyweds,” says event planner Roxanne Bellamy of Roxanne Bellamy & Co. “The reception has components that can include toasts, dinner, dancing, and other types of entertainment. It's a great way for friends and family to offer their congratulations to the new couple.”

The History of the Wedding Reception

Wedding receptions started as a way for the bride’s parents to host a celebratory meal, typically at home, after the ceremony, says event planner. “Receptions were hospitality to receive society, friends, and family—hence the name reception,” says Meyer. “The couple was to receive everyone via a receiving line, greeting each guest as they entered.”

For centuries, wedding receptions have varied by society, religion, and region. “Most cultures have some form of a reception, ranging from 30 minutes to multiple days,” says Meyer.

The style and length of Western receptions, traditionally paid for by the bride’s family, also changed over generations. “The receiving line evolved into grand introductions, for those who preferred more of a moment for everyone, instead of many tiny personal moments,” says Meyer. “If they had a lot of money, or too many people to fit in the house, they moved the reception elsewhere. Some families got together to host mass weddings, where multiple couples had receptions at the same time, to save costs and celebrate outside of their homes.”

Common Elements of the Modern Western Wedding Reception

Contemporary receptions have many common elements—but no two are exactly alike.

Timelines

“Today wedding receptions come in all shapes and sizes, at all times, and at various locations around the globe,” says Meyer, noting the rise of destination weddings. “The standard Western wedding reception is a five-hour party, the first hour being a cocktail hour, the next four hours split between dinner, dancing, and rituals—like cake cutting and speeches.”

Venues

Modern receptions are less likely to be held at home or in the church hall, and the guidelines indicating who pays are more flexible than ever. “Since religion is no longer the center of the ceremony, dictating its location, couples are getting creative in deciding where and when they marry. Many couples are being married in nature, in an event space, a ballroom, on a mountaintop, in front of the ocean,” says Meyer. “Modern receptions are also evolving away from the bride's family paying, as marriage equality is now celebrated in the United States, so with two grooms or two brides, families may split the costs—or the couples may pay for it themselves.”

Traditions

Traditional cultural elements still play a key role in many wedding receptions, with couples incorporating food, music, and rituals from their family’s background. “Jumping the broom, a money dance, or a tea ceremony, may be incorporated into a wedding reception to celebrate one's heritage,” says Bellamy. “Additionally, performances by mariachi or junkanoo bands, for instance, are great ways to showcase the couple's cultural identity in a fun, vibrant, and entertaining way.”

Wedding Reception Requirements

The specifics of a wedding reception are as unique as the couples they honor. A festive atmosphere is typically the goal; often this means music, dancing, and a great meal, but if you prefer carnival games or cricket over a packed dance floor, a jazz trio over pop covers, or your favorite food truck over a local caterer, then personal twists on tradition are allowed (and encouraged). 

“My hard-and-fast rule is that as long as there is food, drink, and music, everything is flexible,” says Meyer. “There is no study to show that the style of wedding reception you have, what you wear, what you eat, where you do it, how you do it, or how much you spend on it affects your marriage, so do you!”

Many receptions include some or all of a few common traditions, including a blessing of the meal, speeches from the couple’s wedding party or family, a Champagne toast, a formal first dance for the couple, parent dances, and a cake cutting (or other dessert presentation). There’s really only one element you shouldn’t skip: the meal. “While nothing is absolute, it is common and, and let's be honest, definitely expected, that there is some element of food at a wedding reception,” says Bellamy.

However, you can infuse the menu with your personality by opting for traditional cultural dishes, ordering your favorite takeout, or adding late-night snacks from your go-to bakery. “Receptions can be morning, afternoon, or evening, which will dictate the type of food you serve,” says Meyer. “You are not limited to formal plated meals—you can have a family- or cocktail-style meal, a floating supper, or a buffet. You have to decide which one is best for you and your celebration."

When Is a Wedding Reception Held?

A majority of couples plan a reception that immediately follows their ceremony—but that’s not a requirement. “The timing and format of a wedding celebration is completely up to the couple and their personal choices,” says Bellamy. Some couples may host a morning ceremony and an evening reception; elope in Europe and celebrate with friends and family stateside months later; or say “I Do” at City Hall on Wednesday and plan their reception for Friday evening.

“We do have some couples have cocktail hour first, where the couple attends, and that leads into the ceremony, and from there the reception,” says Meyer. “There is no wrong way to do it, as long as you think through the logistics and guest experience."

Who Should Be Invited to a Wedding Reception?

Creating a final guest list for your wedding reception might be as simple as inviting your immediate family and no one else, or it may require months of negotiations between your parents and in-laws (and your budget). Traditional etiquette dictates that everyone invited to the ceremony will be invited to the reception; modern manners don’t require the reverse. “If having an intimate wedding ceremony with 25 of your closest friends and family feels good, then you should do that. If, after an intimate ceremony, opening up the reception to more guests for an epic celebration feels good, then do that,” says Bellamy. “Couples should feel empowered to have the wedding celebration that feels right for them.”

Personalizing Your Wedding Reception

Marking your marriage with a celebration that includes your nearest and dearest can look different for everyone, whether you host an al fresco dinner on your family’s dock, a ‘70s-inspired bash for 200 in a converted barn, or a black-tie seated dinner at your city’s best hotel. 

“Weddings are a once-in-a-lifetime celebration honoring a couples' love story and their journey together,” says Bellamy. “These receptions are a reflection of the couple's shared experiences, their values and interests, or their cultural backgrounds. Creating a distinctive wedding reception truly adds to the overall magic of the day, making it more personal and meaningful, cementing the memory of the wedding day not only for the couple but for their guests, as well.”

Personalizing your reception details—the design, the menu, the favors, the entertainment—allows you to start your married life in a unique and memorable way. “Weddings are a celebration between people in love, and that celebration should be authentic to them—so their celebration should feel like them, look like them, sound like them, and be filled with their favorite foods, colors, patterns, music, and people!” says Meyer. “Personalization is what sets weddings apart, it's what makes them unique, and it's what brings couples and their loved ones joy. How you personalize your wedding says a lot about the way you will live your life: Will it be on your own terms or simply doing what everyone else does?”